“I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it's very difficult to find anyone.'
I should think so — in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner!”
This week, I
finally got to see The Hobbit. I’m a bit of a Middle Earth fan, not hardcore,
but I enjoyed the books a few years back and was very excited at the
announcement of the first of the Rings Trilogy.
During and
after watching the The Hobbit, I felt I was falling in love with Bilbo as
played impeccably by Martin Freeman. Truth be told, I have always had a thing
for Mr. Freeman, ever since we were introduced to him in The Office. I wanted
to date the hapless Tim and now I want to marry Bilbo. He is perfect at this
stage of my life:
·
He
likes food, cooking & eating. He has a full pantry. ✓
·
He
has a nice home in the country. ✓
·
He
is adventurous. ✓
·
He
is single. ✓
·
He
likes books. ✓
The Shire is
so familiar to me coming from farming background myself. I see a field of
Alpacas keeping company close by while I wile away the sunny days, knitting,
reading and engaging in a bit of cleaning, I suppose. Such a great place to start a family of our own. So
what to make for our little baby Baggins?.....
.... Perfect! |
Okay, so Bilbo is a little shorter and little hairier than I would have hoped but I’m
open-minded. He has taken a liking to walking around barefoot but then again,
so do I, while at home at least. There
is that problem with that blasted Ring though, giving my Bilbo the ability to
disappear, at will, as he places the Ring on his finger.
“I think it’s
your turn to do the washing-up.”
Gone!
I remind Bil,
it’s his turn to give Baby a night feed, only to be faced by a warm empty space
in the bed. And what with his friends? A very tall man in a pointy hat shows up
at the door asking if Bilbo is in and that’s it…..I won’t see him until poor
Baby is celebrating his 18th birthday!
It brings me
back to a few years ago when I had a massive crush on Strider from The Rings
Trilogy. My darling Strider, you would go off and marry that Elven harlot. Okay, she had unnatural beauty,
spoke poetically and was a dab hand at horseriding, but still!
Oh January,
I think it’s time to return to the dating sites.
“Desperately
seeking a short, hairy man who likes adventures and doesn’t wear Rings!”
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